Pilling a Cat

The diagnosis is in:  it's the thyroid. Apparently a normal level is 0-4, or something along those lines, and Sybil's level is at 6.  So, we get to try pilling her twice a day indefinitely.  It is better than having to give her mouth-to-mouth, but only slightly.

My vet does not have a good bedside manner.  I think she and Judgmental Pediatrician may have attended medical school together. 

Me:  Do you have the results of Sybil's blood test yet?

Vet:  No.  You know, that should've been back yesterday.  Hmm.  Let me call the lab.  I'll call you back...sometime.

(three hours later)

Vet:  Well, it looks like it may be the thyroid.

(long discussion on pilling techniques)

Me:  Will giving her a half-pill twice a day for the rest of her life be productive?

Vet: Excuse me?

Me:  Will she live longer if I do this?

(long silence punctuated by breathing)

Me:  I read on the Internet that thyroid problems can cause kidney failure.  Is there any way to know how long this has been going on?  Will the pills help?

(no response)

Me:  My husband told me she also has a heart murmur.

Vet:  Yes.

Me:  Is there anything we should be doing about that?

Vet:  Well, she is sixteen.

(implication of certain death hangs in the air)

Me:  Hmm.  Well, thanks.  I guess.

click

Why do vets not have to take psychology classes?