Moi - A Room Mother?

This week is Teacher Appreciation Week, or something like that, at the Emerald City.  We had to do things like dress our children all in one color (for a photo, although I'm sure part of it was just to see if we would do it), bring in one flower per teacher, etc. Tonight I have to help clean up from some sort of happy hour buffet they put on (with or without martinis?) for the teachers, which in my world are really more daycare workers.

I think this is a great idea, except for the insane Room Mother Coalition.  They hang all these sign-up sheets on the doors asking us to drop by at 3 p.m. on Thursday to do this or that. Now really, Room Mothers, oh you of the stay-at-home-mom variety whose children are in the Emerald City's private school and who control All That Goes On at the Emerald City - if we could drop in at 3, wouldn't we NOT USE DAYCARE?  I think sometimes they forget that little nugget.  Sorry, but it annoyed me.

After I expressed my extreme confusion about the activities of the week, the director informed me that Waddler B has no room mother, and therefore the kindergarten room mother is overseeing us. Would I like to be a room mother?  I think I might have actually turned red.

Here is my dilemma. I know I am a mother.  I know, intellectually, that I am an adult. But just as I blanched when I saw my name listed as "Mrs. A." on one of my student's papers, I can't fathom becoming a room mother. It smacks of suburbia and people who wear running shoes with pantyhose. I realize I am being ridiculous, but I'm not ready for smashed freedom fries in the carseat and sensible haircuts.  I'm not ready to be a room mother!  I'm still trying to realize I'm a real mother! CALGON...

Although, tangent, making the kids all dress in one color reminded me of a guy I knew in college. He made everyone refer to him as "The Cat." I don't know why. There was no frame of reference. I dated him for a while, and even with me, he insisted on referring to himself as The Cat. He'd get entire rooms full of people he didn't know calling him that. And to this day,  I think he just did it to see if they would.  And they did. Just like how the little angel went to school on Monday wearing all pink.

Hmph.