On Large Vehicles and Other Rationalizations

We have an urban assault vehicle. It's a 4x4 Ford Explorer - gray, with lovely leather seats, a sun roof and a CD player. It's six years old, and we bought it at a Saturn dealership, where they gave us the same payments on the Explorer as we'd had previously on his Ford Escort. It seemed like a miracle at the time, and in some ways, when you think about the difference between an Escort and an Explorer, it was.

However, now we are addicted to our cavernous space. A friend recently pointed out that her sister has two children under the age of six and gets around just fine in her Camry. My friend C., whose darling son is only a few weeks older than my little angel, flies around town easily in her PT Cruiser. In fact, most people I know with kids have normal cars or the occasional minivan (not that there's anything wrong with those, but it's just not an option for moi - we had one growing up and it reminds me of my mother). I pondered my friend's statement about the Camry and wondered why the hell I do need so much space? Then I remembered our last trip to great-grandma's 95th birthday in Minnesota, when we inherited four full-size tubs of hand-me-downs, which all eventually will have to be returned on roadies. Or when my mother purchased one of those exersaucer things at a garage sale and gave it to us in Iowa, forcing us to stuff it in our already-full vehicle for the drive home. Or how every time we go on an overnight roadtrip, we take our suitcase, clothes, burp rags, bibs, diapers, formula, a pack-n-play and sometimes (if the little angel has been prone to fussiness) the vibrating bouncer seat along with us in addition to the stroller and Banana Chaise with Canopy that already live in the truck permanently.

What is wrong with us? Why can't we survive with less baby crap? Why do we need this huge, gas-guzzling vehicle? I'll tell you why - because we have one. Once you go truck, it's very hard to go back. I drive my little '94 Geo Prizm to work every day, and the carseat fits just fine in the back of that, but when I go for an overnight visit, I want my space, dammit. I want to be able to decide to pick up a calf or a family of five en route to my final destination. I love it when my mother asks me if I have room for something she wants to pawn off on me (she kept all of my childhood toys) and I say SURE, of COURSE we have room! Yeah! We have an ENORMOUS VEHICLE!!!

So, yes, I am a little defensive about my SUV-driving habits. I realize I'm contaminating the planet just as much as all those Lincoln Towncar and Ford 150 drivers. I rationalize it by adding together the gas mileage of the Explorer and the Geo and dividing by two - see, two Honda Accords. That's what we really have, if you look at it that way. I own my love for my monster. When it snows and I can charge through three icebergs to rescue the little angel from Oz, I will chuckle contentedly as I pass all those Mini-Coops stuck in the slush. ha ha ha ha I am an urban nightmare.