First, Let Me Watch You Humiliate Yourself

The neighbors are out of town. They've asked us to water their flowers since it will not rain in Kansas City again before the Mayan calendar runs out. We said, "Sure!" 

The first night I went over to water, I found the hose in back to be already on with a device attached to the top. It looked like a quick adaptor, but when I tried to put the nozzle in, it just shot water all over me. So then I decided to take the quick adaptor off, because WTF?

BAD IDEA.

As I watched water come shooting out the sides as I attempted to unscrew the adaptor, I remembered my neighbor saying something vague about the hose in the back never turning off.

Huh.

I watered everything while growing more concerned. I couldn't leave the adaptor off for a week, but if I tried to screw it back on, I was going to get even more soaked. And I was wearing my glasses, and I really hate it when my glasses get wet. It wasn't until I had the adaptor almost on that it occurred to me I could crimp the hose to at least slow the avalanche of water currently drenching me from head to toe.

No, I'm not known for my common sense. Thanks!

Fast-forward to last night. Saddened by the knowledge I have to do this every night this week because I am the only one home, I headed across the street. The little angel trotted along behind me in her skort and cowgirl boots, because that's all she wears ever since she read that is Taylor Swift's favorite outfit.

Me: Want to help me water the flowers?

Her: No, I want to go play.

Me: Okay, so what are you waiting for?

Her: I wanted to watch you get drenched first.